^stimulus money well spent.

What do you plan on doing with your stimulus check? I’m assuming, of course, that you are actually going to receive one as a taxpayer. If you aren’t a taxpayer, then you probably don’t have a job…and if you don’t have a job..well, you have other issues and none of this shit applies to you now does it?

I think I’m going to actually do the opposite of what the Administration wants me to do with this failed attempt of economic recovery. There are a lot of people who I know who have already earmarked that money to engage in the most useless of economic stimuli, conspicuous consumption. There are going to be LOTS of new gators and fancy suits purchased. Lots of new rims and stereo systems, and I think barflies are going to order more expensive cognacs than they usually do. Jigs will be balling out of control for approximately one calendar week.

What’s funny is that all that useless spending is exactly what people are betting on. You’ll blow through that money buying shit that you don’t need–millions of citizens tripping over each other to hurry and give the money right back to the same group of idiots. I’m going to try and be on the other side of the financial information equation in that I want to invest/save the money. Recessions are an inevitable part of the business cycle, and often it’s needed to clear out the market imperfections in any normally functioning capitalist economy. Hilariously, people are holding to the textbook definition that we need ‘two consecutive periods of negative economic growth,’ which means you don’t know you’re in a recession until you’re in one. Well F what you heard, we’re in one. So you basically have two options.

1) Be a good little consumer-bitch and give the money back.

2) Pretend you have an ounce of common sense and preserve your ability to cause economic leakages and save that money. Start a Roth IRA. Put a decent portfolio together of stocks together and make that cash make more cash. If you can read and have over 100 IQ points between your ears, you can beat the market. Most large cap stocks are essentially on sale right now. You can’t make money any easier (well, without a strong pimp hand and a team of hoe-ass-hoes at least), since these stocks will inevitably pick back up on the other side of the recession. This is what rich people have been doing forever and it’s part of the reason that they are a part of the leisure class. These people live off of interest, bond coupon payments, and dividends–that’s the world I want a part of.

I know that most people will choose option one, and be perfectly happy that they did. What I’m hoping is that we start to shift this nation’s priorities from ‘consumption is king’, into promoting saving. People spend so much time trying to impress others with expensive shit that they really can’t afford it’s perplexing. Amazing how only a few people are paying attention to the erosion of the middle class and the widening gaps between rich as hell and broke as fuck. I guess my only question is:

Do people really want to win, or just look good losing?

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