I truly hope you and your circus freak-looking family had a good Christmas–complete with your Aunts’ questionable casserole, the awkward accidental outing of you and your ‘friend’ from college, and Santa bringing you absolutely nothing you asked for. Be grateful to whomever you pray to that you’re actually still alive for some ridiculous reason, and that you can try again in the ‘08 to do all the idealistic shit that you said you were gonna do in ‘07.

I hope maybe this year you can actually become a productive member of this idiot nation, maybe not just another mindless automoton. Hopefully you didn’t spend your kids’ diaper money on presents at the last minute for people you really don’t care too much about like you did last Christmas.

I hope everyone can step away from the daily nonsense of life and appreciate the small shit during this time of year. Seems kinda stupid idealistic, I know, because the probability that someone within a mile radius from me right now is getting robbed or shot is very high.

I hope Santa brought Dick Cheney a soul and Coondelezza Rice got some of her Blackness back.

I hope you don’t get too drunk on New Years Eve and start ‘08 off with a DWI.

I hope the Democrats in Congress got some testicular fortitude.

I kinda look at the end of each year like a giant reset button. No matter how bad you screwed things up this year, just pretend like you can reset and try again Jan 1. Luckily for me and my flawless logic, mistakes are impossibly unrealistic.

Happy Holidays, bitches.

This entry was posted on Wednesday, December 26th, 2007 at 4:19 pm and is filed under Uncategorized, religious bullshit. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.